Sunday, November 07, 2010

Thirty Days of Truth: Day 5

Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.

I hope for so many things. My heart swells with hope. My knees bulge with hope. My hair recedes with hope (On a side note, hair observes the rule of conservation of mass: it vanishes from your skull and pops up... elsewhere. Aging is just a terrible thing). Even on the dullest day, the most torpid afternoons, the kind of days when Sherlock Holmes would reach for his violin and a syringe, hope keeps my eyes open.

My hopes haven't changed that much since my teenage years. When I was four years old I wanted to be an ichthyologist, but I guess at some point I decided that I knew all I needed to know about fish. At some point my inchoate desires resolved into writerly ambitions. That's it, my teenage self said, I am going to be a writer. Not just a writer, but A Writer Of Important Books Of Poetry. Everyone will want to read my Important Books Of Poetry. After all, poetry is widely read and enjoyed. And if it isn't, my Important Books Of Poetry will change that shit up. And isn't literary fame its own reward, with a deck chair in Elysium reserved just for me?

Some years later, I've learned that poetry is not nearly as big a hit as my limited experience had led me to believe. And a Great Modernist Novel will likely be bought by only a few and read by even fewer. But none of that has capped my hope, which is that I will write my way into enduring greatness. There a few obstacles in my path - inveterate laziness being only one of them - but the hope persists, and lights the way.

***
 
These entries are part of the Thirty Days of Truth Project, which I agreed to do with several friends, because apparently we're shy about our masochism.

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

6 comments:

sweetsalty kate said...

Oh my gosh, I could never answer this. Come to think of it, I don't know if I could answer any of these questions authentically. I'd have to lie. Cause what do I really hope to do someday? It doesn't involve the parking lot at Walt Disney World.

Oooh look. I'm an enigma. I'm starting to like this thirty days thing.

I realize I'm practicing my new enigmahood on your blog and I realize that's generally what one's own blog is for. Sorry. The thing I hope for the most is to be able to be a selfish bastard without apology, self-doubt, or caveats. So far, I'm failing. Dammit.

sweetsalty kate said...

(P.S. You already change shit up.)

Anonymous said...

I really hope you felt a smug sense of pride and accomplishment when you realized you'd learned everything you needed to know about fish.

palinode said...

thelittlebig - Oh totally. I was like, "Them bastids got fins on 'em". And that was that.

Helvetica said...

Thank you for the phrase "wackadoo dystopia". It will keep me smiling for a whole day. Also, I am having fun imagining you as Emperor Bokassa II.

Helvetica said...

Yes, yes, I commented on the wrong post. I am going to repost my comment again, in the correct plac, even though you've now already read it (with, no doubt, a bemused smile) BECAUSE I CAN AND BECAUSE I AM SLOW.