Monday, August 31, 2009

Poems for Monsters #8: Grimace

Hello burger lovers –
Have we got a surprise
For you. Grimace –

Our lovable mascot –
Has come to play.
So smile as Grimace goes by.

And – we cannot
emphasize this enough –
do not move

or sip your drinks or speak
above a whisper. Do not whimper
when Grimace goes by.

Quiet your babies, think
softly – picture a meadow
when Grimace goes by.

Avoid his shadow.
Plug your ears.
When Grimace leaves

The staff will come by
to dispose of your food
and give you a Happy

Meal, with a smile.

5 comments:

Mr. Saucy said...

I hate Grimace.

The Holmes said...

This is the creepiest one yet. Love it.

Deb said...

You need to audioblog these. Please.

Knuckle Toes said...

Grimace always seemed like everything a mascot should not be.
"Eat McDonalds, the food here has nothing to do with the fact that I am a large obese purple monster (clearly with poor circulation caused by clogged arteries) with a name like 'Grimace' who scares small children"
Right.

Bobblehead Shakespeare said...

I believe his official name is "The Grimace"

I treeplanted one summer with a graduate of McDonald's U who informed me of this little known fact.