Saturday, February 21, 2009

talking with the future

[The last sad dry powdery minutes of the work week. Schmutzie sends an email to Palinode. They enjoy the following discussion. Or perhaps only Palinode enjoys the following discussion].

Schmutzie: I need to get out of the house.

Palinode: YOU NEED TO GET OUT OF THE FUTURE.

Schmutzie: What?! I am going to have a shower and leave the house. You?

Palinode: DON'T YOU ALREADY KNOW? AREN'T YOU IN THE FUTURE? Sheesh. But if you're going to O'Hanlon's I'll meet you there.

Schmutzie: Coolio.

Palinode: Coolio? IS COOLIO DEAD IN THE FUTURE? NO, DON'T TELL ME. WAIT, YOU CAN TELL ME. HOW DOES COOLIO DIE?

Palinode: HELLO?

Palinode: HAVE YOU ALREADY DUMPED ME IN THE FUTURE?

*The all-caps style is necessary to communicate with people across the gulf of time. Communication across time is done with tachyons, and you need to be very emphatic with tachyons if you want them to take your messages.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are so brilliant and amazing. Marry me.

/brandon\ said...

from my time machine. I actually left a comment on this post years into the future

Bruce said...

The ultimate hell, is a place you are banished to where you know the future.....you long to kill yourself, because you know everything that is going to happen and can't do a thing about it.......think about that....oh, wait, you probably already have.

Cecilieaux said...

I knew about the tachyons, but what software works for you?