Sunday, January 04, 2009

#19 Bad Idea: The Yarn Hat

Knitters: how many times have you found yourself on the bus or train or trapped in a coffin, needles at the ready, only to find that you have nowhere to put your yarn? Real knitters, the ones who will knit any material in any situation, the ones who will climb the Matterhorn to knit a cozy over its peak, the ones who, stiff-fingered and red-eyed and oblivious to the hours, will knit in the dark and transcribe the night with the clickety-click of their needles, the ones who dream of knitting their cat a sweater out of their cat's hair, need special hats for the purpose.

I don't have my scanner hooked up to show you my illustration, and I don't have pencil and paper to actually draw my illustration, but I have devised a patented and premium headgear technology to aid the serious knitter in those moments when space is at a premium and someone's baby desperately needs tiny socks. The Yarn Hat is a modified aluminum mess tray with a round hole cut in the centre (for the noggin) and regularly spaced holes around the perimeter through which different yarns can be threaded. The skeins fit in the compartments along the brim.

Additional components include a clip on the brim to hold patterns and hooks from which to dangle quivers of needles. You can even glue an mp3 player to the Yarn Hat for additional functionality.

Are there details to be worked out? Will there be issues in marketing my headgear technology? No. I'm going to be so rich from this idea that I'm already rich.


savia said...

Was your lovely wife, perhaps, the inspiration for this bad idea? I think you should get her to model the prototype.

dk said...

or get her to reengineer it into a good idea ;) clickety clack!

Chris said...

I'm seeing some draught beers on either side with clips that hold chips and assorted jerkies.

palinode said...

savia - Yes, she inspired me. She was in fact the wind beneath this entry's wings.

dk - Are you saying this wasn't already a great idea - maybe the most important one to ever visit and transform Western civilization? Because it just may be.

Chris - Ah, you've spotted the shadow side of the yarn hat. With assorted jerkies. But you'd need some kind of system for making sure that you get the jerky you want, every time. Maybe a kind of head-worn automat?

greeneggsandtam said...

I think this has some potential as a piece for the not-so-ancient-art of Japanese Chindogu.