Wait. This one is a doozy. I scribbled something down on a piece of paper the other day while I was watching TV, and even though I can't really be sure of what I wrote down, I'm pretty sure it says "No. 1 Most Homeless Guy Recommended Product". When people ask me what it's like to make a living from the written word, I don't tell them that much of what I write down is kind of like that. And why don't I tell them? For reasons of personal security.
Anyway, today's idea is: an opera divided into 3.5 acts for kazoo, saw and an old Duran Duran album (maybe Seven and the Ragged Tiger). Lyrics taken from the Xanax product monograph. The action is set in a world much like our own, except homeless people are held in the kind of worshipful slackjawed regard we reserve for doctors. Homeless people drive fancy cars, live like kings and graciously accept money from passersby. Doctors are kicked down the street and pelted with dogshit. Is there a story? Not really. Homeless people tend to suffer from brain damage, alcoholism or mental illness, and it's tough to keep them on message and following a plotline. But there is a thread running through the opera about a homeless guy who recommends a pharmaceutical product, which becomes so popular that he is suspected of being a doctor. He falls in love, soils himself and gets shot, probably in that order. Off to bed with me.