Hey check this out. Last week we bought a bag of onions from the grocery store. It turns out that at least one of those onions is the Elder God Cthulhu, who has woken from His eldritch sleep of death and journeyed from the underwater stone city R'lyeh. I guess the stars must be right for His awakening.
You can use His tentacles in sauces and stir fries, or simply chop finely into your salad as a garnish!
D'you know, I think He's reaching to turn off the kitchen light. His Will is to Become One with The Darkness.
I think He noticed me when I took His unholy image here.
8 comments:
That's not Cthulu it's Shuddle Mell!
Wow. What an unfortunate end to an innocent trip to the market.
palinode,
how frightening is your produce!!
that sounds like a japanese game show: "How Frightening is Your Produce?"
Creeeepy.
unsigned - That always sounds more like a pirate name than some Elder God.
yccm's' - I know. All we wanted was some produce. There should be a label of some kind, like 'warning: product was produced in a facility with nuts, wheat, Yogg-Sothoth, soy.'
diva - It's true. Why were we marked for eldritch visitation in our groceries?
mathew - Contestants are thrown into a pit full of durian and forced to eat their way to freedom. A delicious, stinky, spiky fate awaits them.
abigail - You should see what happens when he tries to crawl into bed on cold nights. His Unearthly Tentacles are some clammy in the darkness.
the starfruit are right! (ripe?) teke-li-li! i never liked onions until now.
Thanks...now I am going to have onion nightmares.
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